Male Fashion and Sexyness - Topic of the day 7/17/24

What do you wear when you want to feel sexy? And to expand on this,why do you want to feel sexy? We quite often advise against dressing for the purpose of attracting the desired sex, but isn't that what dressing sexy is all about? Consider the fact that the person writing this is a devil's advocate before you lambast him for posing this question.
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394 Replies
Scott
Scott5mo ago
:monkaS:
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
art...
Weeg
Weeg5mo ago
The key to being sexy is rolling up your sleeves /thread
knappheit
knappheit5mo ago
I wear a lot of cologne Not too many clothes
I'm Lagging
I'm Lagging5mo ago
alright I considered you're a devil's advocate art you still suck
knappheit
knappheit5mo ago
I feel sexy also when I wear safe outfits that k always feel comfortable in
Gatan do rock
Gatan do rock5mo ago
im gay
sam
sam5mo ago
hi gay
knappheit
knappheit5mo ago
Fair Gay people can’t dress sexy
eggtart!
eggtart!5mo ago
whatever k-pop idols wear since that industry has maximized the male/female gaze (im half serious)
Gatan do rock
Gatan do rock5mo ago
hi daddy 🤤
Esper
Esper5mo ago
Rick Owen's
sam
sam5mo ago
i didn't realize my arms looked good until i started wearing tank tops and people started commenting on it. so it kinda went in reverse for me. got that twink swimmer build
knappheit
knappheit5mo ago
Im Joking by the way
sam
sam5mo ago
i took it seriously iral 🤝
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
I said I’d steer clear of this one but nvm. Feeling „sexy“ as a big guy is weird. I feel sexy when I look in the mirror and see more of the person I’m working towards rather than where I am right now I guess. For me that has to do with my looks feeling comfortable, as well as „flattering“.
I'm Lagging
I'm Lagging5mo ago
(note: rick sexiness is automatically cancelled out if you're less than 5'10)
knappheit
knappheit5mo ago
Nooo your so sexy …
Gatan do rock
Gatan do rock5mo ago
anyway I think the image you give is sexier than the amount of skin you show. on men specially.
sam
sam5mo ago
noooo please don't kill yuorself ur too sexy ahaha.. ..
I'm Lagging
I'm Lagging5mo ago
haha what if u sent a sexy pic jk .. unless?
Esper
Esper5mo ago
my real answer is that i feel sexy when i wear things my partner thinks are sexy which is mostly workwear with tucked tees and boots
artvandelayimporting
I'm going to take this seriously give me a sec
knappheit
knappheit5mo ago
Yeah please send sexy pics everyone
eggtart!
eggtart!5mo ago
i carry my paddle around on weekends when i have practice and i unironically feel hot asf carrying a big stick around
knappheit
knappheit5mo ago
And I’ll tell you if you’re sexy or not
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
This is not to say I feel sexy when I look skinny in the mirror. It’s about being comfortable where I’m at.
Weeg
Weeg5mo ago
I dont know if i ever feel sexy but sometimes i feel kinda hunky
Esper
Esper5mo ago
i also find my personal sexiness meter depends much more on grooming and hygene than it does Putting That Shit On
sam
sam5mo ago
yeah i feel sexy when i feel put together
Smiles
Smiles5mo ago
Egg may be joking but he isn't wrong that K-pop has figured out how to monetize this
Gatan do rock
Gatan do rock5mo ago
yup
Smiles
Smiles5mo ago
it isn't showing skin either
Gatan do rock
Gatan do rock5mo ago
kpop is mostly selling the husband material image like a lot of people think suits are sexy and suits arent showing skin
Gatan do rock
Gatan do rock5mo ago
we got badboys and we got nice happy boyfriend who smells like fresh lavender
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sam
sam5mo ago
i cackled
eggtart!
eggtart!5mo ago
like u wouldn't wear stage outfits but idols get dressed all the time by their stylist (to fulfill sponsorships also)
artvandelayimporting
I think this is probably my most 'conventionally' sexy outfit but for me personally it didn't feel that way because this isn't really me, it was essentially a costume I put on for the fit battle.
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I'm Lagging
I'm Lagging5mo ago
speak for yourself jk I can't afford that shit :hell:
eggtart!
eggtart!5mo ago
certain groups have certain vibes and then individual members have their own perferences or curated images so im sure if you actually made an effort to dig into kpop there's a shiton of inspo
Smiles
Smiles5mo ago
Its really not that expensive outside of the massive groups
artvandelayimporting
I feel much more sexy when I wear something like this because it's truer to who I am and gives me more confidence, even though it doesn't immediately read as 'sexy'
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Smiles
Smiles5mo ago
most smaller groups can't afford designer or anything
seth
seth5mo ago
hubba hubba
eggtart!
eggtart!5mo ago
I should be more specific but BTS would be good to look at
carrion
carrion5mo ago
tbh this prompt has me thinkin hard because a part of my reasons for putting shit on is genuinely to be attractive. But the people i want to attract = all. But I'm also in a closed relationship so the goal isn't attracting people for any specific reason. So why is that a goal? Idk I probably like the feeling of power ig!
eggtart!
eggtart!5mo ago
Very different styles
artvandelayimporting
I just like walkin around town with my trader joes bag lookin cute as hell because it makes my dopamine go
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
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eggtart!
eggtart!5mo ago
I think sexy is just mental tbh But I'm also being reductive
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
I believe that is what we call a 'skill issue'
carrion
carrion5mo ago
the knowledge that ur tj bag has caused a rift in at least one relationship is enough to sustain u I feel that
Smiles
Smiles5mo ago
I have a similar thing where to me confidence is the core of it, which is a bit of a cop out but feeling like you are hitting your vibe perfectly is like the core. Like these two are some of my favorites
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Smiles
Smiles5mo ago
im just vain, its great
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
you look like a sexy gary oldman
I'm Lagging
I'm Lagging5mo ago
came from the man himself smh
Smiles
Smiles5mo ago
like this shows more skin but like, its more of a lazy hot day outfit. Its not bad, but its not the exact same feeling
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Smiles
Smiles5mo ago
so similar feeling to art
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
Rick Owens (2016): "Being short is a skill issue"
artvandelayimporting
nevermind this is when I was the sexiest because I'm smoking and smoking is the sexiest thing a person can do
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carrion
carrion5mo ago
Sleeves? rolled Smoke? ing
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
Man I wish smoking wasn’t unhealthy and smelled bad and wasn’t expensive because it looks hella cool
Gatan do rock
Gatan do rock5mo ago
meirl
Esper
Esper5mo ago
+1 for art's statement about authenticity - first fit was put together by my partner based on what she finds attractive and it's much more cohesive yet it felt like a costume so i didn't feel sexy at all. Second fit is simple and true to me and I felt like a million bucks in it.
Esper
Esper5mo ago
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Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
I hate that smoking made a resurgence, its grim Killed my uncle
artvandelayimporting
it's weed guys don't worry perfectly harmless
carrion
carrion5mo ago
good for you, even
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
phew
artvandelayimporting
it's like drinking a smoothie
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
Well as long as you aren't smoking 20 a day And if you are.. THEY KNOW THEY ALL KNOW THEY ARE COMING THROUGH THE WALLS
Weeg
Weeg5mo ago
Dare i say cigarettes are much sexier than weed
carrion
carrion5mo ago
forbidden fruit
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
Weird what a few billion pounds and decades of marketing can do
goofus
goofus5mo ago
just wait until the timmy chal bob dylan movie comes out, everybody going to switch back from vapes to cigs
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
Fewer batteries in the trash at least
sharloy
sharloy5mo ago
Imagine getting mugged by the guys on the left with their stone island patches Cuz it looks like suckin dick Go on a smoke break with a candy cig and then just eat it Wait yall are so in denial that smoking is sexy Long and skinny cigs are hot Sure it’s from 50s marketing You know what else is hot in western cultures? Sun tanning. Which also gives you cancer Double standard much???
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
I used to work part time reporting. You only ever really feel like a journalist when you’re smoking.
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
I grew up with basically everyone smoking. The smell is vile as a former smoker, maybe it looks good on social media
Gatan do rock
Gatan do rock5mo ago
I live with a smoker and we fight on the smell weekly
Weeg
Weeg5mo ago
Oh yeah our across the hall neighbors smoke inside its awful
Guatemalean Toupee
Smoking discourse Wish it didn’t kill ya But it does
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
I remember when they blanket banned indoor smoking in Ireland, that was a wild few months of people trying to find loopholes Smoking to look cool: expensive, smells bad, kills you Drinking glasses of red wine to look cool: pretty cheap if you got no standards, made of fruit, maybe you live forever??
Gatan do rock
Gatan do rock5mo ago
my big gripe is that the smell gets on my clothes that are hung to dry and she complains of my complaints 🤦‍♂️
Guatemalean Toupee
Ewww that sucks Red wine doesn’t get you zonked tho :nooooo: :nooooo: But yeah probably a terrible idea to indulge in any substances just to look cooler or sexier
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
oof
knappheit
knappheit5mo ago
smoking w a comically long cigarette holder and reading the newspaper now thats sexy more the reading the newspaper part tbh
zeometer
zeometer5mo ago
as someone who did not have a great self-image until very recently bc obese it took a while to grapple with the idea a) of being sexy and b) being physically desirable in dress. i think it's further compounded by being a gay man, where (if you're looking) how you are considered desirable and what one would consider desirable exist on a similar plane
zeometer
zeometer5mo ago
i've come to associate sexiness with confidence and with ease, and that tends to come about more in a fit on the top vs on the bottom
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goofus
goofus5mo ago
your veins are wild zeo nurses dream
zeometer
zeometer5mo ago
yeah and see that's another thing - the veins frequently come up a lot and while many would deem that as something desirable or attractive or a sign that i'm shredded i don't necessarily always think that way
damb
damb5mo ago
I don't think high vascularity equates to being shredded I know a lot of people who have great arms but cores are lacking
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
smoking is sexy, when I quit my sex appeal dropped like 17% and I can feel it
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
sorry is it the top or the bottom fits where you feel most confident
zeometer
zeometer5mo ago
top = more confident
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
ooooo ok
edenede
edenede5mo ago
Smoking wore u
damb
damb5mo ago
Smoking is sexy objectively but smelling like shit isn't sexy
carrion
carrion5mo ago
also not being able to taste anything ughhhh
zeometer
zeometer5mo ago
i don't either but some of the response i get when bearing arms suggest otherwise. it's largely not intentional and i don't feel objectified it's just i don't see it for me
damb
damb5mo ago
And being broke
goofus
goofus5mo ago
also just the willingly giving yourself cancer
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
nah I made it look good
damb
damb5mo ago
It's fashionable when you're young
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
Okay but this is something I genuinely don’t understand I had no problem tasting things
damb
damb5mo ago
Looks ass when you're old and wrinkly still addicted
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
I plan to pick up smoking again when I’m like 65
damb
damb5mo ago
I smoke a ton of weed so I have no grounds to stand on
carrion
carrion5mo ago
hmmmm maybe it's like cilantro soap gene idk but when I quit I noticed my sense of taste improve dramatically
edenede
edenede5mo ago
Okkkk 👀
Esper
Esper5mo ago
smoking is also one of those things with optics dictated by class: i.e. classy if you're rich, trashy if you're poor
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
smoking cigars vs smoking cigs actually I feel due to manosphere cringe fuckers cigars are less cool than they've ever been
damb
damb5mo ago
I'm part Cuban so cigars are my culture /hj
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
I have also been smoking since I was 14 so it may have something to do with many foods I was only exposed to after starting to smoke
carrion
carrion5mo ago
Idk I started at 16 lmao
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
Im uk/ireland so I constantly have to NOT use our word for cigarettes around Americans
damb
damb5mo ago
But back to the topic of sexiness, I feel like attracting the desired sex with my drip has also made members of the same sex (men) aggro towards me It's happened my entire life both on and off the internet
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
Yeah thats absolutely a thing
Esper
Esper5mo ago
yep
awburkey
awburkey5mo ago
smoking looks hot on the internet bc I can't smell it
carrion
carrion5mo ago
No I totally feel these even tho my desired sex is all, I always get aggro dudes
damb
damb5mo ago
If I'm being honest it happens to me in here 💀
Soup
Soup5mo ago
Where do we land on smoking pipes?
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Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
Your swag too different, they'll kill you Spongedamb
damb
damb5mo ago
It's definitely a novelty but can be sexy depending on whose using it (you look sexy)
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
Higher difficulty, but you're nailing it
awburkey
awburkey5mo ago
this looks like a scene from letterkenny I'm sorry u look good tho
damb
damb5mo ago
It's the sneak dissing/attempts at clowning for me
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
This looks like County Letterkenny so
Soup
Soup5mo ago
Not far off, this was on Skye
carrion
carrion5mo ago
Pipes are cool cuz Gandalf smoked pipes thems the rules
Soup
Soup5mo ago
but yeh I haven't even touched it in maybe two years or so, it was only ever an occasional weekend thing
Digs
Digs5mo ago
Thought this was a picture of ted at his cabin for a sec
Soup
Soup5mo ago
LOL
Smiles
Smiles5mo ago
People think they look like tolkein but really look insufferable
Soup
Soup5mo ago
hit me with the real truth don't hold back
Digs
Digs5mo ago
Tolkein was likely at least a bit insufferable im willing to bet Dude is a hyper nerd
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
Fit challenge: looks sexy smoking a bong
Digs
Digs5mo ago
Also the GOAT tho
Esper
Esper5mo ago
this photo just called me ten-ply
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
disagreeing politely in Ursula. K. le Guin
Soup
Soup5mo ago
I would never Also had to google that one to figure out what it meant
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
From what I’ve read, everyone liked him a lot irl and that made CS Lewis even more jealous See also: Octavia Butler
Digs
Digs5mo ago
I feel very similar to holfram on this one, my weight has given me some extremely hard to deal with body issues and seeing myself as sexy is not really something i can do at this point in my life. I have come to a point though where i feel stylish and happy in my outward appearance which i guess is the first step to sexy enlightenment
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
CS Lewis was a chump
Digs
Digs5mo ago
The Lewis/Tolkien frenemy saga is hilarious i want a period comedy show of them
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
Digs your fits are great and I wish I had the confidence you do to post them
Soup
Soup5mo ago
To give a serious answer here after diverting it to tolkien somehow (not helping on the us as experts of male sexiness allegations here) I would agree with what was said by many other people earlier, mainly Ian I think. A lot of stuff that makes me feel confident in that way are things that my partner finds attractive. And to echo what Art said those things also feel authentic to myself which probably only further helps with the confidence etc
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
I think they were genuinely good friends, but I also think that if you’re a creative and your bff works in the same medium as you then you’re going to be competitive
Digs
Digs5mo ago
Thank you i really appreciate that! I feel like ive made a lot of strides in working on myself which feels very rewarding to me.
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
The best thing I ever did was just accepting that I can look good and be stylish without having to change my body necessarily.
Digs
Digs5mo ago
Yah very much agree.
Shrimp
Shrimp5mo ago
Echoing digs and eurodigs. I wrote yesterday that my style has gotten better just by posting in WAYWT, but I think it has also come with a lot of confidence. Learning how to look my best has sort of gotten me out of my head and made me feel great about who I am.
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
It always surprises me by what other people think looks hot on me compared to my.. not explicitly going for sexy as a vibe. The westernwear stuff in moderation is apparently catnip
Shrimp
Shrimp5mo ago
And with that confidence/comfort in my own skin has led to feeling alot better in other ways including feeling a lot sexier
damb
damb5mo ago
I've personally felt more body confident after I started lifting, I was strictly a cross country runner before I got into kettlebells in 2020 after a hip injury
Shrimp
Shrimp5mo ago
I also think that forcing myself to have a big smile in my waywt photos has helped me somehow lol
damb
damb5mo ago
But my skincare routine has also helped me feel more sexi
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
Obviously it’s hard to feel sexy when I look nothing like what’s „supposed to be sexy“. But that doesn’t mean I can’t feel good about myself.
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
I went the other way, was doing great on the weights for a lanky fuck, then tore my rotator cuff and its back to running!
Shrimp
Shrimp5mo ago
This one is for my big boys of MFAD
Digs
Digs5mo ago
Yah western wear tends to get me the most compliments which i also dont totally understand
awburkey
awburkey5mo ago
Deciding to smile in my fit pics decidedly increased reacts and more importantly how much I liked the photos once I got over the initial weirdness
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
I take most of my pics at 6am, I am not smiling for those lol
damb
damb5mo ago
Sorry to hear that 😩 how'd you injure yourself? Barbell?
aud
aud5mo ago
my friend did her master's thesis on him and apparently cs Lewis got so sick of going on walks with Tolkien cause he stopped to look at every single plant that he started making their younger friends go on walks with him instead
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
Someone smarter than me can probably explain how it ties into a certain kind of rugged masculine thing. I just like how the buttons go pop 🙂
Digs
Digs5mo ago
Tolkien ruining the hot girl walk by being the biggest fucking nerd
aud
aud5mo ago
my actual hero
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
It’s weird sometimes. I get the most compliments on stuff that’s a bit more fitted than what I usually like. Tbf I have a low tolerance for what I consider too tight.
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
dumbell flys, overextended...
aud
aud5mo ago
looking at plants on walks is sexy
Digs
Digs5mo ago
Boot slip on no tying 🤷🏼‍♂️
Shrimp
Shrimp5mo ago
what i find funny, is that you, digs and I all have smoke shows of partners lmao
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
"Sorry ma'am the boots stay ON in bed"
Shrimp
Shrimp5mo ago
tbh i think its in our heads
aud
aud5mo ago
but actually, sexy is a state of mind and it's been fun to figure out where I feel sexiest outside of the "showing skin is sexy" mentality
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
I consider myself a personality hire in that department
damb
damb5mo ago
Omg 😭😭
Digs
Digs5mo ago
As always. Its swag Swag all the way down
aud
aud5mo ago
it always comes down to it
Gatan do rock
Gatan do rock5mo ago
Shrimp
Shrimp5mo ago
that charlie quote i swear is the most real shit in this server
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
On the plus side, my other shoulder is still double jointed 😭
Shrimp
Shrimp5mo ago
they've been gone for so long and yet, they are still spitting facts in here
damb
damb5mo ago
I mean that's not an extremely unique take tbf
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
Its good, without being advice
Shrimp
Shrimp5mo ago
i think its just a good reminder that we're all in our heads sometimes
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
This is how I feel about sexiness tbh. I mostly have only felt sexy in life and the times I’ve not felt sexy have been when I specifically have tried to dress to impress anyone besides myself
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
true cant consume your way out of being swagless
Digs
Digs5mo ago
Back when i was swagless i prioritized sexiness as like a primary factor when getting dressed to go out and now it is very much a low priority for me. But in dressing in way that makes me happier i have increased my confidence and become, therefore, sexier.
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
I feel sexy when I wear what I like. If I show skin and I like it then it’s sexy, if I don’t show skin and I like it, then it is still sexy.
Digs
Digs5mo ago
In short if you are trying to dress sexy but feel like a dork, its gonna have the opposite effect
squilliam
squilliam5mo ago
i remember when i was like 15 i read an article in gq that said women thinks it is sexy when men roll their shirt sleeves up to the elbow and this permanently changed my brain chemistry
damb
damb5mo ago
I feel like a dork wearing a tie tbh
Digs
Digs5mo ago
We all saw the same gq article i think lol
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
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Shrimp
Shrimp5mo ago
btw good topic today @artvandelayimporting or whoever came up with it
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
This is probably the sexiest I’ve felt
Shrimp
Shrimp5mo ago
now im feelin sexy
aud
aud5mo ago
yeah for me feeling sexy often happens when I feel the most chill as well as self-embodied in how I'm dressing, and the concept of trying hard to be sexy for an occasion or moment is feeling further and further away from me (also some gender stuff about all the effort women are supposed to put in to be considered sexy)
damb
damb5mo ago
I feel negative sex appeal wearing formal wear
squilliam
squilliam5mo ago
worldwide MFA activation moment
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
And I’m not showing anything here
artvandelayimporting
strategically placed my forearm tattoos to hang halfway out when I roll my sleeves
Digs
Digs5mo ago
Probably cause its uncomfortable ti you Me when deciding placement for my chest tattoo
Smiles
Smiles5mo ago
no it was every "Woman of reddit what do you find hot in men?" askreddit thread in 2013
Digs
Digs5mo ago
:stonks:
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
that guy now almost certainly runs a youtube account called Real Fellas Fashion, and wears the too tight shirts
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
Also I cannot for the life of me figure out when discord lets my add a message to my photo and when it doesn’t. Sorry stork that, but it’s a whole different problem anyways
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
Love that for you 🙂
damb
damb5mo ago
Hella
Digs
Digs5mo ago
And the fucking backwards baseball cap
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
shit, hes gonna ba Alpha M
Digs
Digs5mo ago
I hate wearing ballcaps backwards
Smiles
Smiles5mo ago
eventually i realized the demographics of reddit were skewing those threads so unbelievably hard
artvandelayimporting
this is what women want
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Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
I used to assume all Americans wore ball caps all the time, its just they wear them a Lot more than we do
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
Ash Ketchum ass accessory
lyon
lyon5mo ago
there is also like. the weird trans angle to it because sometimes i’ll feel sexy in one way and not the other way. and then i get one-two punched by dysphoria
carrion
carrion5mo ago
we get free ballcap from burger store
squilliam
squilliam5mo ago
this is definitely the fate of every single esquire writer after their inevitable layoff
Digs
Digs5mo ago
Its to hide the tiny bald eagle that lives in every americans hair
damb
damb5mo ago
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Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
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lyon
lyon5mo ago
i will defend the baseball hat + pokémon method of accessorizing outfits to death with my life lmao that was a formative experience in learning how to put that shit on
squilliam
squilliam5mo ago
i recently started wearing a ballcap after like 10+ years of not liking them much and I have to admit i do feel cooler
lyon
lyon5mo ago
also ditto
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
I wear them but they make me look less cool (I need them for running)
lyon
lyon5mo ago
you will enjoy the ballcap more if the hat you’re putting on is a ballcap you adore
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
just gonna throw this out there: does anyone actually want to attract someone who buys into prescriptive notions of what is sexy that are based entirely on shitty patriarchal and capitalist standards? Regardless of gender or sexual orientation, do you want to be with the person who that GQ article is about?
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
my head is absurdly big and also my hair fuck no
carrion
carrion5mo ago
no but also sometimes
artvandelayimporting
the virgin
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Digs
Digs5mo ago
Just gonna say this. If i were single again i would want a potential partner to like the style i like, not some cosplay of a gq dude.
artvandelayimporting
the chad
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damb
damb5mo ago
Nothing like a baddie saying "I love your style"
squilliam
squilliam5mo ago
complicated answer. I think when you're young you have no idea what this kind of prescriptive sexiness means for finding a possible partner. some people never grow out of this mindset unfortunately hence this weird new form of misogyny where everything involving women is dei unless its sexual in nature
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
Ya but only if I like their style too
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
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damb
damb5mo ago
Well real recognize real I'm afraid
Smiles
Smiles5mo ago
we know you don't have any baddies on your island
damb
damb5mo ago
If she don't fw my swag she shops at forever21
Shrimp
Shrimp5mo ago
I'm not sure how gender dysphoria compares to body dysmorphia in terms of how it feels or the societal pressure that is associated with it, but if our conversation above about bigger bodies has any relation then working through some of those feelings will have huge payoffs
Digs
Digs5mo ago
If they aint willin to hit the bins with me they aint the one
Guatemalean Toupee
Do you glove up for the bins or go at em raw
lyon
lyon5mo ago
yeah absolutely. i know they’re related experiences for sure
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
hitting the bins raw is real romance
carrion
carrion5mo ago
having both gender & body dysmorphia is fuckin stupid but I'm happy my solution has been "gain a bunch of weight and become a nasty gym rat" don't get me wrong the dsymorphia is still there but at least now I can carry it
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
Ngl I wish any of the thrift stores near me had bins
Esper
Esper5mo ago
REAL
Digs
Digs5mo ago
This is like new game plus
Guatemalean Toupee
Accidentally touching your crush’s hand (and a pile of shit) at the bins :letsfuckinggo: :letsfuckinggo:
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
I've been trying really hard to find something to say in this thread cuz I'm asexual so I have never ever dressed to attract anyone nor have i felt societal pressure to but i think other people like jawntanamo and meat (and others) put it best. it's rly about how self confident i feel in what i wear more than dressing for x group of people. i feel like my friends can tell when i feel confident vs when i don't and i noticed i mostly get irl compliments when i myself feel good
Shrimp
Shrimp5mo ago
huge, and the confidence of this is sexy in itself
carrion
carrion5mo ago
this is the funniest gender related joke anyone ever hit me with holy shit
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
digs a true ally
Digs
Digs5mo ago
Dysphoria prepare to die edition
carrion
carrion5mo ago
2 REAL LMAO
damb
damb5mo ago
People engaged in fitness wouldn't have as much body dysmorphia if people were honest about being on HGH
Esper
Esper5mo ago
in my case it was 'hm, maybe i'm not a man but i'm too large/masc to confidently transition so time to hop on test and become as huge as i possibly can'
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
that's so real so many fake natty influencers out there in my bodybuilding phase was when i probably objectively looked the best to most people but i also felt the fucking worst
Shrimp
Shrimp5mo ago
im natty and also I dont lift 💪
Digs
Digs5mo ago
The gymfluencer space is doing untold damage to peoples brains
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
nah scratch that actually i don't think there's an objective best
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
ya now I only like girls who look like they can beat me up
carrion
carrion5mo ago
It sucks cuz my gym is a regular spot for a handful of bodybuilders and they are so open about juicing, and online is all vague and obfuscate-y
Esper
Esper5mo ago
real, unfortunately
carrion
carrion5mo ago
Like it's not a secret It shouldn't be!
Esper
Esper5mo ago
i'll happily talk about my hormone use with anybody as will all the other people i know irl who are on it it's just social media that fucking sucks so bad
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
I liked one bodybuilder account to support a friend and now my whole feed is ruined
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
it's a double edged sword of not telling people and causing skewed expectations and dysmorphia vs being open to people and them taking it as endorsement
damb
damb5mo ago
I have high school students getting perms and taking creatine wishing they looked like Max Taylor lifts
carrion
carrion5mo ago
Yeah it def can be, at least in my exp other gym members have been like "it can be super risky and you need to work with a doctor" etc
awburkey
awburkey5mo ago
"i just wanna be a little toned like Chris Evans when he turns into Captain America"
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
that's probably the best response they could give yeah
Esper
Esper5mo ago
the word toned puts me into a barbarian rage
awburkey
awburkey5mo ago
I ducked immediately after sending that out of instinct
artvandelayimporting
I was so convinced this was gonna be my halloween costume that year
No description
carrion
carrion5mo ago
biceps growing .5 an inch every time I hear toned
Shrimp
Shrimp5mo ago
im gonna be out working today but I'll say one more thing. everyone who posts fit in here is sexy and thats a fact. 🫡
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
I don’t understand why people go to the gym for looks. I’ve recently started physical therapy for my slipped disc and I fully understand why it’s good for me. But I cannot wrap my mind around how it’s fun.
damb
damb5mo ago
Sounds like a good cheat code
Esper
Esper5mo ago
it's fun because it makes the voices go away
damb
damb5mo ago
Because when you look good you feel good or something like that
carrion
carrion5mo ago
gym is fun for me because I like when spreadsheets change
damb
damb5mo ago
Insert Rick quote
Esper
Esper5mo ago
rick gotta be the least successful steroid user of all time
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
it's fun to push yourself physically and to actually see the fruits of your labor in the mirror and in the weightroom
carrion
carrion5mo ago
sometime number go up sometime number go down but always number change
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
for some i will add, not all
damb
damb5mo ago
Also hand calluses make me feel sexy
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
Hm, I understand y’all’s points somewhat. The main problem I have usually is that while my body is doing work my mind remains unchallenged and that makes the voices come rather than go lol
Guatemalean Toupee
My soft baby hands make me feel sexy 🤺
carrion
carrion5mo ago
mind/muscle connection is what keeps me locked in but that's a different convo imo
Esper
Esper5mo ago
it only works if you blast Full Of Hell at eardrum-bursting volumes
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
No description
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
That’s not what I was getting at but y’all get my point i think
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
ya im just joking lol
Smiles
Smiles5mo ago
Part of it is they lose money if they are open about it
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
If I understand correctly what that is I get it. The most fun I’ve had was while doing kendo but that probably fucked my back fr this time and I’m not sure I’ll be able to go back.
Esper
Esper5mo ago
this fr, its the corporate sponsors that are to blame here gymshark is a fucking cancer
awburkey
awburkey5mo ago
ad-tech strikes again
carrion
carrion5mo ago
Yeah that's true, influencing is such a huge business and I always forget that lmao
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
also isn't it like a federal offence to use some steroids in the USA
Guatemalean Toupee
Damn you did kendo? Cool Do you still have the kendogi/hakama lol Could go hard in a fit
artvandelayimporting
dont...
Guatemalean Toupee
Oh wait Forgot you’re not Asian my b
Esper
Esper5mo ago
america hates gender-affirming care of all types
carrion
carrion5mo ago
yeah it's like, focusing fully on the muscle contractions/expansions. It's very easy for me to slip into that state where I'm fully focused on the movements and my bodys reactions but it's not like that for everyone!
damb
damb5mo ago
I'm looking at YOU Kumail Nanjiani I like that Rob McElhenney is honest about his steroid usage
Holfram
Holfram5mo ago
Not in any competitive manner mind you, but it’s a sport where body and mind are both challenged/occupied by correct form and stuff and that was just right for me. Also yelling makes mind go empty.
Smiles
Smiles5mo ago
Just assume anyone who makes money off their body is using steroids
damb
damb5mo ago
He wasn't wrong 🙈
Smiles
Smiles5mo ago
Actors, influencers, athletes
damb
damb5mo ago
Ozempic is a steroid ? Dang
Guatemalean Toupee
Kinda wish I did martial arts or something
artvandelayimporting
everyone laugh at this joke now because I'm going to delete it because I fear the road someone could choose to take us down
Guatemalean Toupee
My coordination is terrible
damb
damb5mo ago
Never too late
carrion
carrion5mo ago
You still can!! Coordination is a skill that has to be learned like anything else
damb
damb5mo ago
Better late than never
Guatemalean Toupee
True It’s pretty spendy tho 😭
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
my parents did martial arts for the first time in their 40s so ya it's never too late
damb
damb5mo ago
What isn't in this economy
Guatemalean Toupee
Trueee
damb
damb5mo ago
$20 for two rolls of sushi rn Kms
Guatemalean Toupee
I’ll just get a mop and go to the park and study the blade
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
now that's sexy
Shrimp
Shrimp5mo ago
^ hes asexual and even he knows its sexy. its gotta be
Guatemalean Toupee
I have this so I’m set
No description
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
ur lord of the rings looks weird
edenede
edenede5mo ago
Studying the blade is sexy
lyon
lyon5mo ago
mood tho. i fucking followed one (1) queer fitness coach and suddenly my explore page is trying to throw gym bros at me
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
do u think miyamoto musashi also stops to look at every plant on their walk
aud
aud5mo ago
guaranteed Tolkien and Miyamoto would have been legendary besties (sorry not sorry cs Lewis you can take a plant-less hike)
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
i wish someone looked at me like tolkien looks at cool plants
aud
aud5mo ago
what if the cool plants are looking at you like that
Digs
Digs5mo ago
Mf shoulda taken the hint when talking trees turned out to be cooler than talking lions
njoyer
njoyer5mo ago
damn...
Guatemalean Toupee
Ngl tho fencing/hema seem super fun
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
do you follow the buff lumberjack lady too?
Soup
Soup5mo ago
what about the buff lumberjack guy? the comments are wild haha actually they both have the same comments
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
He feels very manosphere adjacent I hate the vibe
Soup
Soup5mo ago
I thought that too but he's not, he had a video calling all that shit out
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
Oh hell yeah haha I support chopping wood
lyon
lyon5mo ago
uhhh one of them is an old-style bodybuilder whose reels are primarily feats of strength (ie, ripping a stack of cards in half and then quartering them, or bursting a rubber water jug with nothing but their own breath), and the other is a butch lesbian who gives guides to bulk up in ways that can help target areas of the body that give dysphoria or to prep for a surgery and also just to get better endurance lemme look and see specifics
Guatemalean Toupee
It’s so extra when it’s raining super hard and his suspender straps are undone and he’s screaming with every strike but y’know I get it
Digs
Digs5mo ago
Lizard brain neurons activating and all that
Guatemalean Toupee
Yep exactly Or when he gets nerdy talking about different axe head shapes
Esper
Esper5mo ago
i'm just happy he's having fun
Digs
Digs5mo ago
To go back to being serious for a moment i think its important to remember that sexiness is such a nebulous idea that its a fool’s errand to try and somehow min max it based of some kind of societal standard. People are so varied in what they like and find attractive that they only thing that truly makes sense is to be authentic to yourself
damb
damb5mo ago
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder or something like that H2o lean same thing
Digs
Digs5mo ago
Yah i could just said that forehead
artvandelayimporting
but what pants do I need
carrion
carrion5mo ago
skirt
Digs
Digs5mo ago
Sigh andrew pants
Soup
Soup5mo ago
Hot take I bought Andrews chinos and I think I hate them
Guatemalean Toupee
Oof
Soup
Soup5mo ago
do not feel sexy wearing those
damb
damb5mo ago
This is swag Take notes
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
I like Andrews cords, but the chinos suck imo
Soup
Soup5mo ago
No yeh I have a pair of cords and I love em so I get this
lyon
lyon5mo ago
Rick StrongBack (@rickstrongback) • Instagram photos and videos
45K Followers, 583 Following, 477 Posts - See Instagram photos and videos from Rick StrongBack (@rickstrongback)
Lizzy Bristow (@body_by_daddy) • Instagram photos and videos
101K Followers, 1,745 Following, 190 Posts - See Instagram photos and videos from Lizzy Bristow (@body_by_daddy)
lyon
lyon5mo ago
found em
jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
On the topic of sexy garms…. The right leather jacket is always sexy There is no one jacket to rule them all, but idc who you are if you got a leather jacket that looks good on, you look sexy
SteezeTrain
SteezeTrain5mo ago
I was in great pain when I found out he lives in my hometown
awburkey
awburkey5mo ago
andrews chinos are great to cut off and turn into cute lil shorts
SteezeTrain
SteezeTrain5mo ago
Theres a guy on reels that instagram keeps trying to show me and he just does get ready vids but with closeups of him putting cologne on his forearms Then the comments are just deranged
Soup
Soup5mo ago
oh this is a great idea, thank you beans
Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
the buff lumberjack lady is way hotter/more cool
Yakkeks
Yakkeks5mo ago
Getting in this a bit late, apologies: So what im getting is that for most of y'all being sexy is very linked to feeling like yourself? To me that totally tracks, because when i dress in a way that I assume is sexy I very much don't feel like myself and its more of a fun little role I play. Which makes sense, because im asexual and all that :xd: I literally once had a friend who told me that they find basically everyone at least low key hot. Then they paused and said "well, on second thought, i don't think I find you hot" 🤣
SteezeTrain
SteezeTrain5mo ago
Its a very nebulous term and I think this topic was meant to explore it you know
Yakkeks
Yakkeks5mo ago
Totally
SteezeTrain
SteezeTrain5mo ago
Obviously people find wildly different things attractive across the entire spectrum
Yakkeks
Yakkeks5mo ago
I have noticed
artvandelayimporting
The goal was to get people talking
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Spuck
Spuck5mo ago
No description
sam
sam5mo ago
i think this is when i felt the hottest, and it's also my favorite fit i've worn—probably not a coincidence as other ppl here have mentioned
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Esper
Esper5mo ago
Heels so good on u
ClassClown
ClassClown5mo ago
I think a lot of "feeling sexy" is having a Clark Kent vibe. Like you have a secret beneath this careful exterior you're showing to the world. And I think a person can do that in myriad ways. I get how showing more skin can be hinting at the secret beneath, but I still think traditional clothing can do it too. I don't think showing skin should be inherently sexualized, of course, but if that's the intention, it certainly works too.
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jawntanamo_bae
jawntanamo_bae5mo ago
this is v hot
sam
sam5mo ago
i barely crack average height so heels are nice very few chances to wear them since my walk to campus is like 15 hill-filled minutes
Weeg
Weeg5mo ago
This is such a banger
sam
sam5mo ago
it's mostly recent helmut lang which is surprising
Sal
Sal5mo ago
Chat is it worth it to scroll up
artvandelayimporting
Yeah this was a good one
adaptation
adaptation5mo ago
No description
Sal
Sal5mo ago
Well at least I learned a bit about steroids
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