Letting Go and Moving On - Topic of the day 12/20/23
What's something in your style journey that you've had to get over in order to have the relationship to clothes that suits YOU? What are some expectations and habits that got in the way in the past that you made the conscious choice to move on from?
19 Replies
I don't need my wife's approval to get a fit off.
admitting that my wardrobe wasn't serving my vison but i was too hesitant about things like expanding beyond sweatpants bc i had a hard time visualizing things on me even though i know i already wanted XYZ
i was churning through poor fit combinations because i literally did not have the items i was trying to replicate
Moving away from slim fits and fully internalizing dressing for myself rather than trying to get laid, or even getting dressed for the internet has made me a lot happier.
I'm working on getting over being a brand snob. I think it can be useful but it tends to limit me more than anything else.
Standing out is ok
also that at some point if i wanted something i just needed to buy the damn thing
Its a confidence issue
I've talked about it before, but the idea of good/correct fit held me back for a long time from getting where I wanted to be
Comfort over everything. I can pretend like my 20oz denim fits me like a glove, or acknowledge that my waist size has grown compared to 8 years ago and let go.
On a related note - sometimes fits just “work” with other people but don’t with me. That’s totally fine.
not paying as much attention to the tagged size, and instead to the measurements of the item has done wonders for me. Also just fully embracing the women’s section on Ebay and thrifting (2 of my best pairs of vintage jeans are women’s.) and finally, incorporating trends / new things where it feels right for me while retaining other aspects of my style that i’ve been rocking for a long time.
i’d also add that sometimes i feel like i have to go 100% in a certain aesthetic or vibe in order to have good style, but in reality i like to fluctuate (some days im feeling workwear, other days gorpcore and sometimes MFA basic B)
I made a whole list awhile back: https://jfarrell468.substack.com/p/hills-i-was-prepared-to-die-on
Hills I was prepared to die on
Things I used to believe, but don’t anymore "Dress sneakers" aren't that bad, and can look good. I will only wear clothing that fits me "properly" Wide, high-waisted pants are ridiculous. After being overweight most of my life, I "deserve" to wear skinny clothing.
For me, realizing that alot of the looks I like are things I like to look at, and dont actually feel comfortable wearing. Particularly avant-garde and goth type stuff, I appreciate it more from a distance
Had to get over personal comfort to get where I wanna go. MFA house style really suits me for whatever reason and I found enough well-fitting and comfortable boots, denim, and sweaters long ago but pushing past what's comfortable and easy lands me at a place where I'm actually interested in fashion again. I don't want a complacent relationship with style and it's a conscious effort most days.
You’re very logical and consistent (jk lol your tastes don’t have to be logical or consistent, I enjoyed reading your list!!)
Glad you enjoyed it.
Learning that I don’t have to buy into every style/aesthetic that I find cool.
I think that letting go of trends for the sake of being on trend/ what other people think looks good. There are some trends that suit me currently, and I roll with them in that sense, but dressing “authentically” is something I find myself moving onto.
That, and some people can have fits that look amazing on them, and that resonate with me, but it doesn’t mean that they’ll look good on me.
Had to give up in my personal style on a lot of aesthetics I love that didn’t match my body type
And learn to dress to complement my body rather than try to regress it to normal
I think not feeling pressured to make every fit "interesting" or having to "play with colour/silhoutte". For me, clothing became a lot more enjoyable once I learned to just wear things I'm comfortable in rather than feeling the need to stay ahead of an arbitrary curve
Same. Spent so much money in my life to have mid or bricked fits because I wanted to try everything