how do I transform my look to attract more women?
I don’t look the greatest and sometimes I look older. Really want to know what style of clothes (I work in a corporate office) to attract females at work or outside. I feel my wardrobe isn’t the greatest.
67 Replies
don't say females, and you look fine in all these pics. do you really want to attract people who only care about your clothes
Your clothes seems fine. I’d get rid of top left or top middle they are the same style of clothes and selfie. Try to have a group picture, get rid of car selfie. Show yourself doing something fun and with people. Pic 3 (top right clothes) is the most approachable but bathroom stalls is not it
youre not wrong but this is not a dating advice server
^
Genuinely,
1. stop calling them females
2. that's 50% of the population, it's impossible to be attractive to everyone and it's demeaning to speak the way you are rn tbqh.
From this post and your previous posts your biggest hangup is, respectfully, your self esteem and confidence. Fashion can help but we aren't really the place to teach you how to love yourself.
I wouldn't think about what clothes are the best to attract women, I would think about what clothes you feel the most confident and comfortable wearing and that feel the most you
Oh thought it was fair game when people said not to call them females (which I agree with). But noted
nah that's just basic respect, not advice to get dates.
That’s more just getting this dude to respect other human beings
Yes I get that now, I don’t have the best social cues, hence why I thought it was ok but won’t repeat 🦾
@allect here’s my take: you don’t look comfortable in any of these pics. And I don’t mean physically like, “these are comfy clothes” comfy, I mean you don’t look like you feel comfortable in your own skin let alone the clothes. I could be dead wrong, but the fact that you’re posting this and phrasing it this way is sort of telltale. You gotta stop dressing for others (or what you think is dressing for others) and start dressing for yourself homie. I’m not saying it’ll fix you, or make you a whole new person like a butterfly coming out a cocoon, but it makes a HUGE difference.
I would also not worry about dressing for the office as much because I suspect there's a dress code to follow
Think about what you want to be wearing outside of work because in theory that's where you'd be the most comfortable anyway
Art’s right on the money
You’re a good lookin dude, homie, you just gotta try to feel that way about yourself
agree that your clothing is fine but that you need to dress for yourself. if you look like you want to crawl out of your skin, the only women who will want to date you are 'fixers' or supremely fucked up abusers, and tbh you don't want to date either of those women. you deserve to have a healthy relationship with someone who is mentally stable.
I think we can give meaningful advice without ascribing “types” to people
maybe you can, but i find it quite difficult. thank you for your input tho.
you can just delete the middle sentence lol
and betray my morals by being inauthentic to my genuine self? i think not, dearest reader.
LOL
the fuck
“My morals oblige me to tell you I hate women”
@Virus be normal, do not be a misogynist, do not be weird, thank you
op, in terms of changing up your wardrobe, what types of clothing help you feel like you are your best self?
you specifically mention you feel like sometimes you look older than you actually are, perhaps just experimenting with different types of accessories may help you find personal style you feel at home in? (edit to add: because the clothing in your OP photos feel rather timeless to me, with perhaps a skew toward millennial age due to pants being more fitted vs loose
Telling somebody that the only people who will be attracted to them are mentally unstable is not only extremely unhelpful and disrespectful but also a massive self-report in regards to how you view the value of women and the mentally ill. Do better.
Typing for that long and not coming in with a salient comment and a retraction shows a lack of introspection
Consider why people are taking issue with your comment before you write something else
mod has already requested we not derail further.
@mod i should probably delete my comment to prevent further instances of off topic?
I’m a mod
I'm also a mod
You should explain yourself then I’ll delete it for you
Homie really living up to the username
explain how? that's my opinion/lived experience, i guess i'm just not really sure how much further i could expand on the topic.
ian mentions it's a self-report and i do suppose that's accurate, i don't particularly value myself and i'm both a woman and mentally ill. :blobshrug:
Who needs a mod
Oh man this thread sounds dumb lmao
Okay let me explain what the problem with what you said is so we can move on. Being insecure does not make you unworthy of love. While there are abusive individuals who take advantage of people, implying that only abusers would be interested in someone because of your perception of them is diminishing and demeaning to both the person you’re talking to and the wide range of people in the other group who aren’t out to get everyone they date. It may be your view that some people take advantage of those with low self esteem, and that is absolutely true, but it is not true that having low self esteem means everyone who shows interest in you is a manipulator or abuser. What that line of thinking does is push you even further away from being able to embrace both yourself, and the others that do care about you.
It’s a destructive line of thinking that villainizes everyone without adjudication and leads to reducing of people into just ideas of individuals and not individuals themselves
Please let me know when you have read and digested this so we can kindly get the thread back on topic
well i've certainly read it.
I’m trying to give you room here, please take it
i'm on day 8 of combo covid and migraine and my boss made me come back to work for a 12 hour shift that i am at the tail end of. i have given all i can at this time.
if you do not feel this is sufficient i will take a time-out for however long the mod team deems appropriate.
If you’re not cogent enough to read something maybe you should consider not writing things either
Hey everyone, didn’t see all the comments until now. I’ve liked and reacted to most of them but I appreciate the feedback! You’re right I have to be more confident in myself. I’ve hit a werid dry spell at my age (30 going to be 31 in 2 months lol) and single. So you’re right it’s definitely more of a dating opinion.
But again like I posted, I do want to start dressing better and more in style. Not to only “look good” but have more impressions. I do feel good in what I wear but finding a style and not looking too try hard is what I want to accomplish
Step 1 in finding your style is paying attention to what other people are wearing and seeing what you like and don’t like for yourself
We can help you refine in a direction and guide you when we know where you want to go
Okay let me post some of the styles I currently wear in every sense. I feel the ones I posted are way too many office selfies
"try hard" is in the eye of the beholder imo; if it makes you feel good (not just physically but mentally) it's worth the effort
maybe instead of posting what you already wear you could post some outfits you've found that you would like to try out for yourself?
I feel I dress way too “immature” in my personal life
Sure I can do that, I just wouldn’t know if it would suit me. Btw by my pics how tall would you say I am?
i would try to get inspo pics anyway - as bishop said it's more impactful to start with what you like or how you want to look specifically and then funnel into "how can i get to this point"
I promise you, your height is not that important
and imo height is less impactful than "how do you want to look"; check #waywt or #inspiration as there's plenty of heights represented
These are some dope fits
I like the baggy style but me being 5”8 doesn’t help lol
You're literally the average height in the US bro. Reread zeo's comment about those channels representing a variety of heights. So many mfers in here are 5'5" and under. It truly does not matter.
i'm gonna make a rec just based on that last picture alone, check out Aime Leon Dore as a starting point for this kind of style inspo.
Also being 5'8 has nothing to do with dressing well, you're 6 inches taller than the average woman anyways 👍
almost positive coltar is not that tall and has the baggiest fits
if coltar is 6'5 i would lose my shit
I really hope I don’t work with anyone that’s in his channel
That would be super embarrassing lol
I think you may be like me, having a frame with a longer torso relative to the length of my legs. With legs that look relatively short, it can help to have pants with a higher rise and a thin, discreet, or no belt — like having side tabs on dress pants instead of belt loops. Avoiding long shirts especially untucked can help. Generally I advocate having clothes that fit well in a style you’re comfortable with.
I’m going to delete the post soon lmao
the internet is a big place, don't worry about it
Thanks man that helps
choosing to put yourelf out there and say 'i would like to get better at [x]' takes a lot of courage. if someone from your workplace sees this i'd hope they would respect your pursuit of self-improvement rather than use it as a way to put you down. if they do they're a dick.
Lol thanks man let’s hope they would be nice haha
But thank you
I just want to dress better
sometimes other things come up when you decide you 'just' want to dress better, and that's okay
this will take time, most likely, and that's also okay
Curious question, what do you think is my ethicnity
i fail to see the relevance to the topic and respectfully choose not to answer
Lmfao!!!
the odds of this are astronomically low, and if anything would just highlight both their fashion nerd-ness and desire to help other people.
there isn't anything wrong with putting effort into the way you look.
if you are overindexing on your physical appearance as the primary driver for general unhappiness, insecurity or perceived lack of success in any arena you're going to have a bad time.
this goes double if you, for some reason, also think it's bad to look like you are trying hard.
genetics are a factor, sure, but people who look good in part because they work out, do skincare, drink water, eat well, or put effort into the clothes they wear and how they accessorize are all "trying hard" in the sense that they are being intentional about how they treat their bodies, or they simply aren't worrying about it that much.
There isn't a silver bullet for your problems. Doing things that make you happy, working on yourself (in this arena and others) and being intentional about where you choose to allocate your limited effort and time on this planet will help to give you a sense of direction and purpose. Therapy might also be a tool to consider in this endeavor.
That said, this is not a dating advice server, and this is not a general self-help server.
The advice you have been given to find sources of inspiration you like and experimenting with clothes is the best advice you will get outside of specific requests for feedback on fits, garments, etc beyond "do I dress immature" or "do I look old."
I am older than you. A bunch of us here are, actually. Look in #waywt or #waywt-highlights for examples of how people of all ages can dress, and feel free to search any of the people in this thread who have given you advice's previous fits by using the discord search function using
from:USERNAME has:image in:waywt
The way you dress is fine. It's not bad, it just doesn't stand out, for good or for bad. You do not dress badly. You do not dress immature for your age. You do not look old (to me, at least, but take that with a grain of salt).
Hope this helps @allect.
Stick around, interact intentionally, look at fits. inspo and ask questions that show you are thinking about the information you've been given up to this point.
Please do not only treat this as a place to offload negativity.
Good luck.I dress exclusively for the approval of weird fashion dudes
Same as car guys