Black Tie “Preferred”

Hey folks, So in one week I’m going to a “Black Tie Preferred” wedding. Thing is, I don’t actually think it’s black tie at all. The event starts at 4:00 PM, there won’t really be live music, the setting isn’t black tie at all, but I get the idea and want to honor the hosts’ wishes by dressing as best as I can. I’ve already confirmed that no small number of other men will be wearing suits instead of tuxedos, so I’ve elected to wear a suit as well. I’m wearing black balmorals (not patent leather), black suit, white shirt. The question is…. What kind of tie? I’m afraid if I wear a black necktie I’ll look like I’m attending a funeral. On the other hand, perhaps wearing a black bow tie gets too close to the full tuxedo look without actual patent leather shoes and velvet lapels, etc. What do you think? Black bow tie or black neck tie? How else can I dress up a black suit for this “black tie preferred” event? And just to clarify since I know some of you will be tempted to push me to get a tuxedo; these people do not know what black tie means. If I wear a tuxedo I will look unusual. It’s kind of a lose/lose. Thanks in advance for any advice!
10 Replies
jfarrell468
jfarrell46810mo ago
Hmm...I think maybe a light color. I feel like a dark tie would look too somber and wrong. And something bright feels wrong too.
TimmytheBonsai
TimmytheBonsaiOP10mo ago
Old r/MFA posts suggest maybe burgundy tie with a white linen pocket square to dress up the black suit for a wedding. Think that would work?
jfarrell468
jfarrell46810mo ago
For example (just for the tie color, not the rest of the outfit)
No description
jfarrell468
jfarrell46810mo ago
Yes, that seems solid
TimmytheBonsai
TimmytheBonsaiOP10mo ago
Man that looks sharp too
jfarrell468
jfarrell46810mo ago
This isn't even the worst wedding dress code we've seen. There was a recent q&a thread where the dress code was "rakish".
Benji
Benji10mo ago
Yah I went to a black tie optional wedding for a second cousin and it was mainly just normal suit fits tho there were a few people wearing tuxes You don't have to wear a black suit too if you don't want to (tbh I prefer charcoal, navy or mid grey for a formal suit) Burgundy tie is good (burgundy grenadine ties look really nice). Striped tie as jfarrell said is good (like a repp tie for example). Tbh anything that isn't too wacky/super informal is good. I wouldn't wear a black necktie to a wedding unless it's a bowtie and I'm wearing a tux Glen plaid, houndstooth, shepherd's check and Macclesfield are also traditional wedding tie patterns so worth a look
TimmytheBonsai
TimmytheBonsaiOP10mo ago
All super helpful. Thank you guys
awburkey
awburkey10mo ago
I think fun dress codes are fun! You just have to provide ideas/detail/pics
Spuck
Spuck10mo ago
Yes but I feel like people forget that most people barely own suits these days let alone a tux, let alone enough bits to get wacky with it
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