Asian accent piece for cocktail attire
Hi! I'm going to a wedding where the bride is from hong kong. For the rehearsal dinner she said "You and [my gf] can wear something Asian if you have it, or just cocktail attire if you don't." The invite says "Chinese formal / cocktail attire" for the dinner.
I would feel weird wearing full Chinese formal, so I'm definitely not going to do that. But I thought about wearing an Asian accent piece with my dark grey suit. I'm thinking a Cheongsam necktie or maybe pocket square.
Would that be appropriate? Do y'all have any other suggestions? Thank you in advance!
108 Replies
https://eastmeetsdress.com/products/classic-dragon-tie
an idea i had. dark grey suit, white dress shirt and pocket square
East Meets Dress
Classic Dragon Tie
The perfect tie to celebrate your culture and wedding tea ceremony in. Features a classic dragon brocade pattern that symbolizes power, courage, and strength. Also available in other colors.
A pocket square or tie feels appropriate. I probably wouldn't do both.
Feels like a territory to tread carefully, to not come off as imitation/appropriation though
Yeah, i'm leaning toward just the tie. I don't know what kind of tie i would wear with that sort of pocket square
Being specifically asked for it seems like a carte blanche as long as you're not a prick
So yeah, I would suggest tie or square. Tie is likely much easier than square to show, whereas square is much more subtle.
i feel like since half of the guests are from hong kong, and the bride asked us to wear something to celebrate, a tie or something should be fine. but yeah, that's why i'm asking around
at first glance that tie looks nice. that with a white square would probably be what i'd choose
nice!
i'd like to find a forest green or something, more my color
Sometimes in stores I see really, really cheap crap that looks made for chinese/lunar new year. Just don't buy... really cheap crap, yknow? You're better off with a good tie, than a shit tie with a dragon theme. But I bet you can find what you're looking for especially if you have time to order online. Tons of emblematic ties out there.
plenty of time, but that's another reason i came asking here. i dont mind spending up to a hundred bucks or so. maybe someone has some good suggestions for where to get this sort of tie
Like, avoid stuff like this. https://www.zazzle.com/chinese+new+year+ties
Chinese New Year Ties | Zazzle
Shopping for customizable Chinese New Year ties is easy on Zazzle. Browse through our thousands of designs or design your own necktie.
I'd look into some color associations in chinese/HK culture. I know red is generally considered good/lucky.. Not sure if a darker green has any connotations
hmm good point
I - relatively cultureless Irish heritage American can't really help you there
funnily enough theres a wiki article on exactly that i found
"Red (t 紅, s 红, hóng), vermilion (丹, dān), and crimson (赤, chì) are associated with masculine yang energy and fire, good fortune and joy. Red is the traditional color used during Chinese New Year and other celebrations, including weddings and wedding gowns."
very cool, great point, ty. will probably go w red
oh no, unless that's like wearing white to an american wedding
~spiral~
couldn't hurt to ask the bride
Well, you have people to ask directly.
Same time, same comment, hah
ha. yep!
would do it sooner than later. time leading up to the wedding can be a whirlwind
yep gonna try and pick out a tie then ask her
Beth and Brian Qipao
Chinese Style tie for men, dragon tie for men, Chiense red tie
Elegant Hand-made Chinese Style Qipao bag Can be matched with Qipao and Hanfu, to experience Chinese history and culture well and feel the beauty of ancient charm, becoming a unique decoration for your costume. The Cheongsam hand bag is also great for home decoration, dinner, party, wedding, or other occasions.
thoughts on those? tough to tell online what will feel cheap and what wont
Yeah, a red power tie is generally a little bit, uh... not it for most people in the US. A brighter, lighter shade of red might work well for what people value in HK but I do not know the answer. A quick search has found me no dragon themed ties that make sense to me, they're either crap, or are more welsh-dragon than chinese-dragon, so I'd want a deeper search
Never heard of the brand, it's hard to say.
yeah it's why i was drawn away from red to begin with
Without being too money-money about it, $33 brand-new price is a bit concerning to me.
yeah, thought the same
Material: JacquardJacquard is not a material, jacquard is more of a ... weave or a description of how the fabric is made and looks.
if they are from hong kong, you may ask if they/their partner know any chinese menswear shops. This may be something that is difficult to get something quality if you don't speak Chinese.
the blue one from eastmeetsdress might be okay? https://eastmeetsdress.com/products/classic-dragon-tie
East Meets Dress
Classic Dragon Tie
The perfect tie to celebrate your culture and wedding tea ceremony in. Features a classic dragon brocade pattern that symbolizes power, courage, and strength. Also available in other colors.
You would expect it to say silk, if it's silk, right? So if they're priced low-end and not made of silk, I would suggest it will look bleh in real life.
Great idea, unfashionable_me.
top review warns of dye leakage onto the dress shirt
oof.
yellow or gold is often associated with dynastic emperors, so maybe that?
a lighter red isn't exactly red anymore
I think the tie is a great idea though
dye leakage is not a concern I have ever had with any tie ever. ouch.
def get it early and wear with a white tee for an afternoon playing video games or somethign first
@gimp @_rej @eggocentric_elmo https://www.etsy.com/listing/214017652/navy-dragon-brocade-necktie?click_key=bc250590aa71a667da44fb843c64e95a738a1ac4%3A214017652&click_sum=928aefcd&ref=related-1
this seems like a good option!
looks good!
I was thinking about something crane-themed but this is even better
the listing says she can custom-make skinnier ties too for a small upcharge
which is nice because i'm 5'11 155lbs so i like to keep ties at least under 3 inches
If I were in your shoes, I would go the square route rather than the tie route. It's more subtle and can be done really tastefully. Something like one of these:
https://www.kentwang.com/accessories/pocket-squares/mandarin-square-silver-pheasant.html
https://www.kentwang.com/accessories/pocket-squares/qianlong-carpet.html
those are great ideas, i really like that
@GSH what would a good shirt/tie combination be with the first one you linked?
what color suit are you wearing?
dark grey
on the darker side of a medium grey, really
Grey Lazio Suit in Pure Wool S110's | SUITSUPPLY US
Shop the Grey Lazio Suit in Pure Wool S110's at Suitsupply. Enjoy FREE delivery and returns on all orders.
white shirt and plenty of tie options. I'll just post several:
https://www.kentwang.com/accessories/ties/grenadine-burgundy.html
https://www.kentwang.com/accessories/ties/grenadine-green.html
https://www.kentwang.com/accessories/ties/shepherd-s-check-black.html
https://www.kentwang.com/accessories/ties/pindot-maroon.html
awesome, thank you so much!
if you have the budget, Vanda also makes great ties
https://shop.vandafineclothing.com/collections/neckties/products/rust-melange-basketweave
i'd rather put the budget to a new dress shirt, i'm not too hot on my current white one
i like the idea of the grenadine green tie, with tthe square you posted
I bet that'd look great
I'll also post the Jacobean Laton square, which is not Chinese at all, but is a well-loved square on MFA for you to consider! https://www.kentwang.com/accessories/pocket-squares/jacobean-laton.html
are wool pocket squares nicer than just silk? I've never seen an upcharge for 70% wool before
I had no idea that KW had that option. I think they added it recently
best to stick with just silk? or would wool be nice
i dont care about the extra 20 bucks
I'm out of my depth here lol but I can't imagine that you'd be disappointed with a 100% silk square. @gimp any thoughts on silk vs wool-silk squares?
get silk and venmo me the 20 bucks
kidding obviously
good options from our man GSH. you're in good hands
thanks everyone!
No offense but this is a poorly made tie, IMO.
no offense taken at all!
for my education, what makes you say so?
I wouldn't pay $20 to have a wool square instead of a silk square, for the same design
I like silk squares. They can have their downsides but generally they're fine. Or great. :)
1) They threw together a bunch of words for materials. Silk, brocade, shantung, chinese brocade, asian brocade, etc.
No reason to do that. Just say... silk. If it's silk. Anything else seems like it's trying too hard. Except for telling me where it's woven - ideally Italy, UK, or sometimes US.
And the photos aren't good enough to see how much it actually looks like, yknow, proper silk, properly woven.
2) Usually emblems aren't nearly so thick and large, it makes it hard to tell what it's actually made of, how it's woven, etc. It makes me skeptical.
3) Look at the back, they can't even align the center properly?
4) Poor product photos, can't really zoom in to see weave, stitching, etc.
sounds good, thanks!
i was gonna just get the silk, but it is sold out. so wool and silk it is! lol
KW also has a few brocade ones I like a lot.
Required reading: https://www.styleforum.net/threads/squarefail-or-the-most-common-reason-why-you-look-like-hell.310176/
Styleforum
SquareFail; or, The Most Common Reason Why You Look Like Hell
As we have seen in the good taste thread, SquareFail is the most common reason an outfit sux. Everything else can be good and the square alone can bring down the whole. SquareFail has three causes:
1) A bad square.
2) A good square badly chosen.
3) A good square well chosen but improperly...
ha yeah i was drawn to this one https://www.kentwang.com/chinese-brocade-blue-bronze.html but wwas afraid of that rule 2 lol
@gimp so, i like that above square (please be honest with me if it's heinous) but i'm struggling to pick a tie (preferably from kw) to go with it
i'm thinking the grenadine ties would be a nice textural contrast, but i'm not sure what color would be most tasteful. i like greens and blues, but i don't think green would look good with that blue/bronze square, and i know i'm not supposed to match up the blue between tie and square either. so i'm thinking....maybe burgundy for the necktie? I'm not sure. do you have any advice?
im a MS paint master
I actually really prefer wool-silk pocket squares. Depends on how you're styling them but I find they just have a nicer drape and can pull off certain folds much better than pure silk. I don't think you'll be disappointed.
Burgundy grenadine is the classiest of classy. Not literally but I love it.
You would generally poof that tie. If square fold, you'd just have a bare centimeter sticking out at most.
cool! but the colors/design are okay together with a dark grey suit and white shirt?
poof tie, square fold pocket square, white dress shirt, dark grey suit
brown belt/shoes
the suit is less textured than that picture but ~shrug~
I'd rock it. But I'm not, like, the paragon of great taste, I sometimes do classic things and sometimes do weird things. ;)
For a charcoal suit to a wedding I'd prefer black shoes and belt if possible. I understand you may not want to spend money to buy what you don't have.
any steer on a particular pair?
allen edmonds-ish budget
I think my favorite combo would probably be a perforated-captoe or medallion-toe black oxford. Standard black captoe oxfords would be the classical safe choice.
it's also the rehearsal dinner not wedding
AE park avenue is a standard, well liked option.
are wingtips not cool anymore haha
a decade ago its what mfa told me to buy w my first suit XD
Rehearsal dinners are obviously less formal (in most cases) but to me, a charcoal suit simply begs for black oxfords. It's not a requirement at all, it used to be ("no brown in town") but it still fits best.
I like a shortwing oxford absolutely.
The neat thing about black is that it does a good job hiding brogueing just a little bit. It's just less in-your-face on black, usually.
so like a black AE mcallister? and maybe the matching belt?
Basically, most people won't notice, if they were ever forced to testify at gunpoint about your fit they would say "he had uhhhh decent shoes on! Probably black! Please, I have a family!" But people who would notice would hardly get offended. It's nit black tie, let alone white tie, it's cocktail attire.
cool! i need a set of black oxfords anyway
is wearing matching belt/shoes nice or kinda gauche?
That seems like a great shoe, as long as it fits well, no complaints from me. Black belts pretty much all match, it's the browns that you gotta be careful with :)
No, in fact, for more formal occasions, it is generally expected to match shoes with a dress belt of the same color.
Except for even more formal occasions in which no belt is worn.
no i mean like
https://www.allenedmonds.com/product/mens-manistee-dress-belt-3022962/black-ec4010571
the brogueing matching the shoes
Ah. I probably wouldn't pay $135 for that. I'd wear one much less formality than charcoal suit cocktail attire.
I'd probably pick that up for $20 on ebay and wear it with a sport coat. Because it's just not 'it' enough for me to want to pay full price because I might decide after 2 wears I don't like it
The standard choice is just the basic, high quality, black belt.
And as a dress belt it will generally be slimmer in thickness and width than a more casual belt, and have a simple buckle, no bullshit.
does MFA have a go-to for that?
Tons of options... AE is a perfectly decent one but a bit overpriced. I think there are belt suggestions here regularly... if only I could remember the names.
AE is good. Alden is good but I mean, I'm hesitant to pay that much. I think people like Hank's. But I honestly can't remember all the names. I think Trafalgar has a good belt at a decent value.
If it was like, color #8 or museum or whatever, I'd say to buy from the shoe company. Black you can pretty much do wherever.
cool cool
thanks for letting me pick your brain!
Any time bro.
Meermin makes a nice black dress belt that'll run you less than AE!
love it, thanks
Meermin Shoes
104135 - BLACK CALF
Our Black calf belt, handmade using the same French calf used in our shoes. As the rest of our belts, the strap width is 35mm & is fully vegetable tanned leather lined. we do not use interlinings to produce our belts, just leather for an added confort & durability. Finished with a single guard your exclusive ni
this guy?
That's the one
@GSH @gimp i'm torn between the burgundy and the black/burgundy for this setup. has anyone seen either in person, or have any recommendation?
I have the burgundy and think it's a great color!
think it would pair nicely w this? https://www.kentwang.com/accessories/pocket-squares/silk/brocade/chinese-brocade-blue-bronze.html
per my shitty MS paint sketch XD
I think it would be totally work, yeah
thanks again!
I'm with it. I like it.
burgundy over black/burgundy?
Burgundy is great. Nothing wrong with the bi-color one. I'd say it's your preference
@gimp @GSH any recommendations for socks with this look? I'm guessing dark grey to match the suit, since i've already got a couple colors/patterns going on with the square and tie?
Yeah, I wouldn't go loud on the socks. The ones you linked look great
nice. mid calf okay? they're sold out of over the calf
weird to me the socks dont have sizes
I've got smaller feet, 8.5 US
OTC is a bit better for dress socks but mid calf do fine too
yeah might try to find an OTC. is there an mfa GOAT for dress socks?
preferably ones that wont bunch up on smaller feet
What about a suit jacket with a short collar ? We call it Mao collar or Officer collar in Europe. It's close to Chinese traditionnal outfits, very elegant, but not too much in my opinion.
That would be super cool! But probably out of the budget for something I wouldn’t get a lot of wear out of. Cool look though
also called Nehru/Mandarin collar